Burger King’s “Real Meals” – My Take

Perhaps some of my followers have heard of Burger King’s new “Real Meals” – kind of like a counter to McDonald’s “Happy Meals,” but for a much older, more mature and dare I say more “real” audience. They come in different varietals, including the “Salty” Meal, “Pissed” Meal, “Blue” Meal, and my personal favorite – the “DGAF” Meal. They will feature a Whopper, fries and drink and will be available at select locations in New York City, Los Angeles, Miami, Austin, Seattle and Miami.

Don’t believe me? See for yourself!


Photo Credit: Burger King Official Facebook Page.

Now, some might find this highly offensive, pessimistic, among other things. I, for one, think it’s absolutely brilliant marketing.

See, here’s the thing – I’m all about being real. I’m all about being true to our deepest inner feelings and expressing those, societal stigma be damned. I refuse to feign happiness just to placate someone, and so should you. Feigning happiness and sweeping your troubles under the rug will just come back to bite you in the ass later. Trust me, I know that one from experience. It’s OK to be salty. It’s OK to be blue and it’s OK not to give a fuck. We’ve all felt that way, whether we want to admit it or not. Maybe this will give us a humorous take on the topic and make it easier for us to express how we feel, for this is how we will beat the stigma against mental health.

So yes, I will “feel my way” and I will be unapologetic about it. If I’m pissed I’ll express it. If I’m sad I’ll express it, and if I just don’t give a fuck I will tell it to your face. I enourage all of you to do the same, and if anyone tells you to smile when you don’t fucking want to, I say tell them where to shove it! It’s fucking insulting when people say that, and they need to cut that shit out.

That’s just my take on the topic. What say you?

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Weighted Blanket – The (Shocking) Results

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So I said I would report back in approximately two weeks in regards to my weighted blanket and how well it’s working for me, but I’m writing this post after just six days because the results are truly shocking and instantaneous.

The first night after I got my blanket I had to be up at 5:00 AM for my Friday half-day in office (note: my current office schedule is currently full-day Monday, half-day Friday and home otherwise) so I didn’t dare take a chance at a sleepless night and downed my usual 50mg diphenhydramine liquid gel, but since then I have not taken one. Have I needed it? Absolutely NOT.

I have slept just as well with my weighted blanket as I ever did on diphenhydramine, and without the night sweats and next-morning grogginess. Luckily the blanket breathes and radiates body heat away from you so it won’t overheat you (this was my big concern as I sleep hot – I’m a Pitta by nature; the “Davy” Dukes serve another purpose than just vanity after all) and the effects it has are immediately calming and quiet my IndyCar-paced mind almost immediately. I drift off to sleep quicker than it would take diphenhydramine to kick in, and naturally.

Now, do I sleep perfectly? Of course not. As has been my sleep pattern for years (even before diphenhydramine), I sleep for 3-4 hours and wake around 2 AM +/- 10 minutes like clockwork, stay awake for a brief period, then nod back off for another 3 hours give or take. It’s what I’ve always done since I was a kid and I don’t expect that pattern to ever change. Alas, being able to achieve my natural sleep pattern again after years of not being able to sleep for shit is absolutely incredible.

Of course, I can’t help but wonder how much of the change is due to my sister from another mister (is that even a term?) virtual cuddling me to sleep every night (a ritual we recently started). Maybe something to figure in, but I imagine it isn’t a huge player. I still appreciate her kindness in that realm though. I will say even she noticed an instant change in how quickly I nod off at night though, so it’s probably a small factor at absolute most.

Now, all that’s fine and good, but how does it actually feel draped over you? I’m sure that’s the question you all are wondering. Does it actually feel heavy or like a lot of weight is pressing down on you? The answer is NO. It does not weigh you down really. It’s a gentle weight – almost like you’re wearing a hug all night. It’s just enough weight/pressure for the secure and calming effect but nowhere near enough to feel like you’re being crushed or suffocated (that is, assuming you get the correct weight for your size – 10% of your body weight plus one pound or half a kg, whichever system you use). To me, it’s just enough for the feeling of “security” without being too much.

Are there some for whom the weighted blanket wouldn’t be a good option? I imagine so, especially if you tend to shift positions frequently. Note that weighted blankets are not meant to fill the size of the bed. They are meant to distribute gentle yet constant pressure over the body. As such, a twin size is the right size for one person, regardless of the size of your bed. Frequent shifting around might cause the blanket to not cover your body entirely at some point. Another is if you just don’t like sleeping with a blanket in general – this will not solve that issue. Other than that, I don’t see many drawbacks to it.

Anyway, I write this to say I’m amazed at how well it’s worked for me. I swore I would have to gradually wean/taper off of the diphenhydramine but that has not been the case. Even though conventional medicine has yet to embrace the concept, we know how that industry operates – if it ain’t pharmaceuticals it’s shit in their eyes. Anyway, if this sounds like something you’d be interested in, check out Weight on Me weighted blankets at https://myweightedblanket.com/ to browse their various prints, styles and materials to find your perfect blanket. Shipping usually takes a few weeks, but trust me when I say the wait is well worth it to get the blanket custom tailored to your specific needs.

I truly am shocked. In a string of devastating blows, I’ve found something that actually works for me. Of course, I have my dear neuro-sister Laina to thank for this – she’s the one who recommended it to me. Thank you so very much, good doctor.

My Blanket Has Arrived!

Remember how I mentioned a couple of weeks ago I was pulling the trigger on a weighted blanket? Well it’s arrived!

Well there it is. Cool pattern huh? Matches my four pairs of space themed meggings beautifully.

Anyway, I’ll report back in a couple of weeks after I’ve slept under it for awhile but man, I crawled under it a few minutes ago and man it was instantly calming – my heart rate and BP dropped considerably as soon as I crawled under it.

So far I am impressed but the sleep test still remains. Hopefully it works as intended!

Jumping on the Weighted Blanket Bandwagon

If it is one thing I have trouble with just about more than anything else it’s sleeping. I can’t sleep for love or money. I’ve lived off of diphenhydramine pills for about the last 2 years or so to help conk me out. I just can’t quiet my anxious, depressed, autistic mind enough to ever fall asleep on my own and it fucking sucks.

Trying to avoid the long-term effects of habitual diphenhydramine use, I got desperate for another option and preferably a non-pharmaceutical one. Taking sleeping pills for an extended period of time can’t possibly be healthy long-term.

Of course, one thing I can’t ever sleep without is a blanket. Even in the dog days of summer I have to have a blanket (I just keep my house cool at night). In light of that, and with the success that Laina said she had with her weighted blanket, I thought there might be something to it. I crawled under hers for a few minutes while visiting and it was so soothing.

So yeah, here we go. I went over to Weight on Me to order my own weighted blanket just to see if it helps. They have all sorts of fun colors and styles to choose from to suit your personal taste. It’ll be a couple of weeks until I take delivery (very rarely do they have pre-made blankets) but again, anything to help me sleep at night I’m willing to try. I’m sick of dragging come midday everyday.

So I guess we shall see. One of two things will happen. Either this will help me sleep or it’ll be a waste of $200. The jury is out but again, I’m willing to try anything at this point. We shall see I guess.

Autistic Case Study – Michael Larson(?)

**This blog is a re-run from an old blog (with some additional commentary from last time), inspired by the upcoming 2019 reboot of PYL. I got no feedback last time, so I figured a rerun was appropriate.**

As a classic (and modern) game show buff, I can probably rattle off details about every major game show scandal that’s happened over the years, but this one has always intrigued me because I can’t help but wonder if this guy was autistic.

Michael Larson, in a single day, won $110,237** on a classic American game show called Press Your Luck. This was unheard of for game shows and especially on a show that relies more on pure dumb luck to amass cash as opposed to skill. Well, this guy didn’t need pure dumb luck to win. He had it all figured out.

For those who don’t remember, the game consisted of a question/answer round and a spin round, where you answered questions to earn spins on the bonus board which consisted of cash, prizes, bonus spins and the dreaded “Whammies” which if you landed on one you’d lose everything you had won up to that point. With the seemingly random operation of the game board, nobody could really beat the game right? WRONG.

Meet Michael Larson who did. People have always marveled at how he did it but I just get this feeling he was probably on the autism spectrum, just judging by his demeanor on the show, intense focus to do what he did and just the way he “came across.” Here’s his episode from PYL, if you have 40 minutes to watch it. Perhaps you can give me your opinions as well. As for how he did it, pay close attention to the board and see if you can figure it out yourself. As I watched his episode I figured it out pretty quickly myself, but none of my neurotypical friends noticed it. Pay particular attention to Michael’s 2nd and 3rd spins as well as Ed’s first spin. This is the easiest time to see what’s going on.

If you don’t have time or you didn’t see it yourself, here’s how he did it:

Takes a certain someone with an eye for pattern recognition, focus and a high attention to detail to notice these things. Wow. Again, as I watched the special on Larson’s episode I picked up on it pretty quickly but a lot of people don’t, and the producers didn’t think anyone would either. Alas, only 5 sequences was sure to be cracked sometime.

Adding to my suspicions that he was autistic are certain things that his family revealed about his private life in the 2003 GSN Documentary Big Bucks: The Press Your Luck Scandal. That can be found uploaded to YT in its entirety here, and if you have an hour and a half to kill it’s a worthy watch.

So what do you think? Does this guy come across as someone who would be on the autism spectrum or is my radar totally broken? I realize it’s speculation but I just get this feeling.

**Adjusting for inflation, in 2019 that would be the equivalent of $267,064. Quite a chunk of change. 

My Love Affair With Pickles

Ever since I was a little kid I’ve been a sucker for all kinds of pickles – bread and butter, dill, fire and ice, hot/spicy, you name it. For those of us who are pickle lovers there’s just nothing that satisfies quite like the tangy, refreshing bite of a pickle.

Anyway, on the way into the office this morning I stopped by the Chevron station just before the office to grab my pickle as I always do – a Van Holten’s Hot Mama. The cashier who doesn’t ever remember my name but just knows me as “the pickle guy” joked with me and said “I think you single handedly buy our entire stock!” Of course I laughed about it but it’s probably true.

Anyway, that reminded me of my childhood. Part of my bedtime routine as a kid was to have a pickle before bed. Every night was the same. There was just something so comforting about the ritual. Of course, I didn’t know the inner workings behind it at the time (as I was not diagnosed as autistic until the age of 14) but all I knew is bedtime didn’t seem complete without my pickle.

Anyway, there was an evil side to it. My dad didn’t find it amusing at all. He thought I had formed a bad habit (said he who to this day smokes two packs of cigarettes per day) and officially banned me from it. Luckily my great-grandmother (rest her soul) saw how uneasy it made me and how I just didn’t sleep well when I was denied my pickle so she started going behind his back to honor my ritual. I sort of “outgrew” this before I was diagnosed (thank goodness – if I hadn’t, given that she passed away before I received a diagnosis I wouldn’t have slept a wink thereafter).

Anyway, I don’t exactly have a pickle every night at this point (and being a busy adult in corporate America half the time I’m up answering emails at 10:00 PM or later because being a slave in corporate America your job never stops) but I still try to have a bedtime ritual of sorts when I can. I don’t always get it and the days I don’t have time for it I sleep like shit but what can you do?

Anyway, I have to wonder – do you have a bedtime routine? Did you as a kid and/or do you still? I’m truly curious. Let me know.

Ink As Therapy

Right on schedule, the Saniderm was ready to come off of my new tattoo and it has now entered the peeling phase, which will last about another week or so. From there I’ll have a finished tattoo that’s ready to show off.

Alas, as any ink enthusiast, ideas have already been swirling in my head for my next one and I think I have a rough concept of what I’ll be getting next. I’ll need to play around with certain design elements but as a matter of “balance” I’ll likely choose placement on the other side in the same spot (since I am all about balance and symmetry – it’s the mathematician/engineer in me). The only one I’ve not yet balanced out is my rib panel but I’m in absolutely no hurry to have my other ribs tattooed – that was a pain unlike anything I’d ever felt before.

Anyway, I digress. Obviously I’ve done the whole gamut for “therapy” – some of it forced upon me by those who also forced existence upon me, some of it voluntarily. I’ve done the whole counseling, behavioral modification and even antidepressant/antipsychotic medications. Nothing ever worked. Nothing was able to quiet my tortured mind. I guess that’s a challenging element of autism – it seems a lot of traditional treatment methods don’t work on us. Maybe this further signifies that autism should not be classified as an illness or disorder? That’s something to chew on for a later time.

Back to the topic at hand. Ink as therapy. Tattoo enthusiasts throw around the term “ink therapy” all the time. Alas, as weird as it sounds, there might be some truth to that statement. As I’ve eluded to it in previous posts, but for me, being in the hot seat is when I’m most at peace. For me, when Jade is working her magic on my human canvas is the only time my mind is ever “quiet” as it were. All the rest of the time it’s racing, typical of those in my tribe. I even have trouble sleeping due to it. Sleep? Hah, what the fuck is that?

With as much negative stigma as there still is around tattoos, the benefits I’ve reaped from my favorite hobby have been incredible. I feel like my overall pain tolerance has improved (day-to-day bumps and scrapes aren’t as bothersome to me as they used to be) and maybe I’ve even gotten an immune boost because I don’t get sick like I used to. There are studies suggesting such too.

In that light, ink has been the one thing that has been able to do what counseling, drugs, etc. were all unable to do. It centers me. It’s meditative. It makes me feel “good.” Shit, as they seem to be the only form of “treatment” that works for me it seems to me my health insurance should fucking pay for my ink. It’s better “medicine” than any of the poison that criminal enterprise known as Big Pharma peddles as such.

I’ve found something that works for me, so at the very least that should be respected and tolerated. Whether or not you even like my tattoos is of no never mind to me (art is subjective after all – a masterpiece to person A could be butt-ugly to person B) as I’ve now transcended past tattoos solely for meaning to the point of just getting them because they look cool and feel good. Call that hedonistic as it were, I admit it is. I’m not hurting myself or anyone else in the process so I fail to see where that’s a problem.

Stay cool and ink it up!