Crisis Averted

Seems like Phoenix had a defective spark plug. Put a new one in and all seems well again. What a relief.

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Father’s Day Pain

Just a reminder that this day isn’t happy for all of us.

The Inked Autist

So I’m going to be a bit of a wet blanket today. So sue me. I’m reposting a Facebook rant here because of the insensitivity of some people with regards to this (i.e. some remarks “at least you still have yours.”). Many of us have deep seated pain on these days, and I’m no exception.

If you want to stop reading now, no problem. I understand. If you dare to continue, please try not to be too judgmental and be forewarned there is some very strong antinatalist language in this rant. If you are offended by such I suggest you stop reading.

I repost this not to make anyone feel sorry for me, but to hopefully make you think twice about passing judgment on a total stranger for any reason. You just don’t know what they’re enduring.


Sigh…

It’s officially Father’s Day, a day that is admittedly quite painful for…

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Bad Luck – It Could Get Better(?)…

…but it’s going to get worst, first (assuming it does even get better).

Well that’s how it all works right? My suspicions were confirmed this morning when I had the diagnostic trouble code read and it came back as P0304 (misfire in cylinder 4).

So yeah. Car is undrivable for now. Driving with a misfire is never a good thing as you risk serious damage to the cat doing that.

Man, what sins am I paying for that I committed in a past life such that I’m being punished dearly for it in this one? Seriously, what did I do to deserve this?

OMG. It just seems like my life will always suck. Like what the actual fuck?

Excuse me while I go fucking cry my eyes, lungs, heart and brains out.

FML.

When It Rains It Pours…

Rough idling? Check. Flashing check engine light? Also check.

Yeah, that’s bad news alright. Rough idling isn’t good obviously (and to be fair I had noticed a vibration on initial start every driving cycle, but didn’t see anything lighting up until tonight so I dismissed it) but a flashing check engine light? Well, anyone who knows the first thing about cars knows that’s about as bad as it gets. A flashing check engine light is a sign of the dreaded P03XX diagnostic trouble code, which indicates a cylinder misfire.

Of course, this is a highly dangerous situation and one that might not be correctible without sinking a shit ton of money into it and of course being car-less for another couple of weeks probably.

It seems what started off dreamy is quickly turning nightmare-ish. Why a German engineered technolgical marvel of a car is having major problems at only 47,000 miles when my old Ford (with the old backronyms “Found On Road Dead,” “Fix Or Repair Daily,” etc.) had almost 87,000 on it the day it was written off, and not once did I *EVER* see a check engine light on that thing. I mean *NEVER.*

Honestly, I just kind of had a sick feeling about that car over the weekend after what someone told me about VWs not lasting in the heat of southern US climate. My dad was quick to dismiss it and say I should look at it anyway. My gut told me to run, but I had my arm twisted into it by dad who took it for a test drive on Saturday while I was at the IndyCar race. Of course at the moment I test drove it and then subsequently drove it off the lot I was absolutely delighted that I had my arm twisted into it but now I’m not so delightful about it. I knew I should have gone for the 2017 Honda Fit I was looking at and had in my mind as the right choice – with only 3,000 miles on it at less than $15,000!!!! I guess I let the “fun factor” of the beefier and sportier yet four model years older Jetta GLI eclipse pure practicality in my mind and now I’m paying for it. Hard.

Hopefully there’s a way out of this. If it’s a simple fix, as per my extended service plan it’s a $100 deductible and the rest is covered. If it’s something serious and not really worth fixing, maybe I can convince them to take the car back? Who knows, but it looks like my relationship with this car could be very short-lived.

Oh well. I guess I was just meant to drive slow-ass boring cars. Bleh. Just one more shit-tastic piece of my shit-tastic life.

And people wonder why I wish I had never been born…

Just a quick remark: the reboot of Press Your Luck was done very well. Elizabeth Banks is a great hostess, and the bonus game is a lot more exciting than I thought it would be.

Peter Tomarken and Bill Carruthers would be proud.

Cigar Review: Smokin Joe’s 34th Anniversary

For cigar smokers looking for a stellar stick at an unbelievable price, definitely stay tuned to this review. You’ll be glad you did.

This commemorative cigar, available exclusively from cigarandpipes.com in New York was blended by E.P. Carillo Cigars and features an Ecuadorian Habano wrapper over a Nicaraguan binder and Nicaraguan and Dominican long fillers. This cigar comes in three vitolas – a 5″ x 50RG Robusto, a 6″ x 52RG Toro, and a 6″ x 60RG Gordo. All three vitolas are less than $5/stick, so definitely budget smoker specials.

So let’s just get into the review and talk about why these sticks are so special. For this review, I am smoking the Toro vitola.

The first light reveals a perfect draw putting off plentiful thick, medium/full bodied smoke. Notes of cedar and pepper dominate out of the gate, along with a smooth leather. Quite a surprising start to such an inexpensive stick.

Getting into the first third the cigar develops in complexity, still holding a medium/full flavor profile. The notes above remain, but are joined by a rich cocoa on the draw and unsalted roasted nuts oh the finish. The smoke is very thick textured and creamy on the palate.

The second third sees the same great complex flavor profile but with the balance of flavors shifting a bit. Whereas the first third emphasized the wood and pepper notes, the cocoa and leather really take over in the second half. That’s really all there is to report as the stick is fairly consistent otherwise, which is fine by me as it has a complexity and richness to the flavors. Ending at 1 hour 15 minutes for a solid burn time for the size and entering a matching medium/full nicotine strength.

Excellent construction throughout with a near razor sharp burn and an ash holding on damn near half the cigar. High quality self-adhesive band that came off without issue and did not damage the wrapper.

I told you that you were going to want to read to the end. You are just not going to find a better cigar in this price bracket. Full of flavor, a nice kick, and an unbelievable price. I hope they make these regular production. Do yourself a flavor and buy a bundle in your preferred size and try it out. You’ll thank me later.

Pair with red wine, rum or imperial stout beer for best results. For what you’re getting for such a diminutive price, I’m giving this cigar a 5/5. It blows away many cigars 3 times its price point and sometimes more.

The Phoenix Rises

Out of the ashes of the tragedy that was the untimely demise of my Fiesta, the Phoenix rises and I am blessed with this gem:

VW3VW4VW1VW2

I went backward two model years but way up in bells and whistles and driving experience. Sure it doesn’t have the same fuel mileage but damn it’s got some guts and is just a much more fun drive.

Really, you should have seen the look on my face the first time I gave it the juice and just took off. The clutch is super smooth, very easy on the leg, and engages at just the right point – not too high or too low. Responsive throttle, but the accelerator is floor mounted so you actually press the top of the pedal instead of the bottom. The only thing I don’t like about the car? No blind spot mirrors. I’m sure I can purchase those without too much cost though.

I guess everything does happen for a reason. I cried tears of anguish when I went to collect my things out of the Fiesta and say goodbye one last time. I’m crying as I write this post, but for the total opposite reason. This is a far nicer car than I ever thought I’d be driving in this life.

Sure, there’s still a grieving process, but having this will definitely ease it along and in due time I will be back to normal. In the meantime, I’m going cruising for a bit. Catch you soon.