Oh No Way, Oh So Way

Stolen from King Ben’s Grandma.

Been so drunk, just couldn’t walk

Oh So Way. Sadly. In my defense, I can count the number of times I’ve been such on one hand. First was at the 2010 Mountain Brewer’s Beer Festival in Idaho Falls. $20 for unlimited samples? Yeah, bad idea. The only other time was after my friend got fired when we were both working at my previous company. I took it hard, needless to say.

Had a near death experience

Unfortunately, that’s also an Oh So Way. In addition to my near suicide back in 2015, I also have a heart conditioned called Wolff-Parkinson-White Syndrome that nearly killed me once. Had a radiofrequency ablation to correct it in 2008 and have been problem-free since then.

Talked to yourself in public

Oh So Way! It’s one of my worst habits truth be told.

Lied about age in order to fit in to the crowd

Oh So Way! Pipe band culture makes you do crazy things. I had developed a taste for Single Malt Scotch way before I was drinking age and so I always said I was 21. Nobody ever questioned it.

Gatecrashed a party

Oh No Way! Do you seriously think I ever get invited to parties?

Sniffed your underwear to see if it’s clean or dirty

Oh No Way! That’s just fucking gross. If in doubt, I will assume dirty.

Not paid a restaurant bill … deliberately

Oh No Way! I have, however, once left a zero tip. Only once, and that’s because the server made a rude remark about my short shorts. She didn’t think I overheard it. I did. Zero tip and a nasty note. I didn’t see here in there ever again after that incident, and I’ve been back there several times.

Woken up in a strange place, oblivious as  to how you got there

Oh No Way! What do you think I am? Stupid?

Worn clothing inside out

Oh So Way! Mostly unintentonal but a couple of intentional uses as well.

Broken a mirror

Oh So Way!  I’m so klutzy. No wonder I have the world’s worst luck!

Believed in a conspiracy theory

Sadly, that’s an Oh So Way. I bought into the whole autism/vaccines conspiracy for the longest time. I don’t know how I ever snapped out of that delusion.

Been involved in a riot

Oh No Way! I’m a lover, not a fighter.

Punched someone

Oh No Way! For one, I don’t like confrontation and I don’t like to fight (see above). For two, I’m thin, weak and frail. I wouldn’t stand a chance against anyone. Why do you think I have a concealed carry license? I want to at least have a fighting chance.

Now you guys know stuff about me you didn’t know before. Are you surprised? Are you up to playing along?

Cigar Review: Aganorsa Leaf Maduro


Welcome to another one of The Inked Autist’s cigar reviews! Today we are taking a look at this offering from Casa Fernandez featuring a Mexican San Andreas Maduro wrapper over Nicaraguan binder and long fillers. The size reviewed today is the 5″ x 54RG box pressed Robusto Extra vitola.

The first light revealed a slightly loose draw putting off big puffs of thick, chewy, medium/full body smoke. Big pepper and earth blast right up front. Tinge of a nuttiness on the finish. A little bit of grit to the texture.

Getting into the first third we have largely the same but the pepper dials back a bit allowing a spicy, unsweetened vanilla extract to enter the draw flavors. There’s also a tiny hint of espresso on the finish going into the retrohale. Still that same grit to the texture.

The 2nd third sees no further changes, holding everything except for a tinge of strength entering the mix. Only a slight shift into the last third as the vanilla morphs more into a nutmeg. Ending at 55 minutes for a slightly better than average burn time for the size and bringing in a medium nicotine strength.

Flawless construction with a near razor sharp burn all the way down. High quality self-adhesive bands that were easy to remove and did not damage the wrapper. Ash holds on about a third at a time.

A lot of the prototypical Mexican San Andreas flavors in this stick. High on body and an overall savory, earthy experience. Enjoyable flavors, though personally I would have liked a tinge of sweetness in the mix to round out the package, but that’s just me personally. This would go well with a hefty red wine or a bourbon. Rating: 4/5.

No Sugar Coating-Our Autism


Most people understand autism as extraordinary behaviors but really the behaviors are the RESULTS of barriers and overstimulation for a billion different reasons that are specific to each individual. Today I am sharing something very personal because autism has become debatable, cliche and sometimes even cool, some people even choosing to “identify “as being autistic like it’s a choice. So to all those people I’m here to tell you, this is not a game, this is some serious shit right here. To the lady who uncomfortably stared at my son at a community event yesterday , sucked her teeth , rolled her eyes and shot me a disapproving look for daring to bring my son out JUST to apparently make her life miserable. All you had to do is stand there !! Noah wanted be there, he fought to be there, he spun,stimmed and banged , he was determined to stay…

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New Ink Preview

Well after going back and forth for awhile we’ve got the design for my next tattoo nailed down and I think it’s a real winner:

If all goes well this should be going down next Saturday (2/2). Stay tuned to see it go from paper to skin; I’m sure you all will be anxious to see it.

Selective Censorship and the Downfall of Facebook

So here I am again, I’ve hit the maximum length for Facebook jail – 30 days. I didn’t even do anything wrong either, but fight back a bit. I’m sorry, but I will not sit by idly and be called a “fag,” “wanker,” “beta male,” among other things and not say something in return. I will stand up for myself. Alas, when these assholes get a free pass and I’m the one who gets slapped with a 30 day jail sentence, that’s when I know for sure things are a problem.

I have no problem with Facebook’s “community standards” as it were. They are a private company and can have whatever code of decorum they wish. That’s not the problem. The problem is how inconsistent they are in enforcing these so-called “standards” and why someone gets a pass for something egregious and then others get in trouble for something trivial.

To me, it’s cut and dry – either consistently enforce your so-called “community standards” fairly, impartially and equitably or don’t have them at all and let the place devolve into a free-for-all. One way or another I don’t really care, but when some rules apply to some people and not others? Yeah, not cool.

What’s even more troubling is the selective censorship of certain viewpoints. I often disagree with the viewpoints that are censored, don’t get me wrong, but when that viewpoint is expressed tactfully and in a way that does not violate the community standards as written then that’s a serious problem. I frequently have philosophical debates on the merits of existence and/or antinatalism that sometimes turn ugly, not from me but from the other party. I can’t count how many times I’ve been called the names above or been told to just kill myself yet somehow all of those get a free pass. Yet somehow by arguing for the antinatalist view I’m “encouraging suicide?” What the actual fuck?!?!?

As a Libertarian I have always advocated for freedom of expression, so long as that expression does not violate the rights of another. If we can’t have a forum with which we can exchange ideas, how are we ever going to learn? How are we ever going to grow?

With that, I think it might be about time for me to pull the plug on Facebook. If they aren’t going to be fair and equitable in their enforcement of their so-called “community standards” then perhaps we should all vote with our feet and find a new platform (or found one). It just sucks there aren’t many other platforms available for me to really keep in contact with my international friends especially. International calling and SMS is ridiculously expensive, and Google Voice only supports international SMS to certain countries.

Happy Robert Burns Day!!!

Just a quick shout out to all my Scottish (and Scottish at heart) friends a very happy Robert Burns Day. Let’s all raise a glass to the immortal memory of the greatest Scottish poet, songwriter and antitheist of all!

If you have one near you I suggest attending a Burns Supper. It’s always a blast, but some of the entertainment is not for the faint of heart.

Our local pipe band was sadly unable to secure a sponsor to hold ours this year and I’m afraid it might have run its course with our old sponsor dying and some of our core group starting to as well. It’s sad really. Our annual Buns Supper was my one time per year I could just let completely loose. Maybe next year?

Of course, last years wasn’t so fun because I had to temper myself as I had a job interview on a Sunday morning of all days, but that was OK because it brought me back “home.”

Anyway, sorry for the tangent. Let’s celebrate. To the immortal memory of Robert Burns!

First Shipment from Privada Cigar Club!

So after watching the CigarObsession Live show featuring Brian Desind (founder of the Privada Cigar Club), and given how much less I’m shelling out on gas every week by not commuting 120 miles round trip for work 5x per week, I decided to take the plunge for the paltry price of about $30/month (after shipping) to the PCC.

After receiving my first shipment, I’m already convinced that if you are a cigar lover like me and you have not yet signed up, you really should sign up. It’s quick and easy, just go to their website, fill out their questionnaire to complete your tasting profile and submit your payment and shipping information. It really is that easy! From there, enjoy 3 either aged, rare/limited release or just plain exceptional cigars per month, handpicked for you based on your profile.

So here then is the first shipment I received yesterday. The packaging was smart and secure and the cigars come pre-humidified with a 69% Boveda pack for you to enjoy right out of the box. Also included within the package were tasting notes for each of the featured cigars in your box as well as pairing suggestions!


All in all for what you’re getting it’s a bargain honestly. You’re getting some great cigars that you would likely pay more for in a B&M shop and it’s a great way to try new cigars.

So with that, yesterday I smoked the choice on the left, the Padilla Finest Hour Habano and truth be told I found his tasting notes pretty accurate. I personally didn’t get much of the licorice myself (but maybe that’s because I don’t eat enough to positively identify it) but I did get a nice smooth cocoa in there. Some additional notes: medium/full body, great easy draw and good construction. There were some burn issues and it did seem to burn quickly (an hour for the Toro size) but it was super windy yesterday so that probably accounted for both of those issues. It was a 4.5/5 rated stick all the way – Brian did a great job picking that one out.

Though I didn’t have any bourbon as per his suggestion, I did have a red wine that I paired it with and it went beautifully with that even so:


I’m definitely excited to try the other two that were featured in this package, but I’ll space them out until the next release is due out in a month.

So yeah, I’m already impressed and would highly recommend any cigar lover join. It’s a total bargain and Brian is about as cool of a guy as you’ll ever talk to. Trust me, you DEFINITELY want in on this.