Dear Bagpipe, FUCK YOU!!!

Has anyone ever punted a bagpipe before? If not, I might be a trendsetter. I just kicked mine 10 feet in the air and about 30 feet out from me. I didn’t know I had such a strong leg and foot! I guess that’s what rage does to you.

So this year, as I usually do, I was to play at a Memorial Day service this morning. OK, done it multiple times before without issue right? Well, as this weekend has not gone according to planned in any way, shape or form why should that have changed now? Well, to add insult to injury, four measures into the tune I suffered a catastrophic reed failure.

When a bagpipe reed fails, it always does so in a big way, suddenly and without warning. That’s the nature of the beast. As most time is spent rehearsing, reed failures usually occur during rehearsals where it’s not that big of a deal. Not this time. I was unlucky enough to experience a reed failure in the middle of a performance. I was left to stand in deafening silence and red faced from both embarrassment and rage.

This has just been the icing on the cake for a weekend that has just fucking sucked all around. For what started out great, it’s been downhill from there ending on a truly shitty note (pun fully intended). I am so mad right now I’m crying.

Well guess who’s not getting invited to play for that service again, or for any more funeral or memorial services hosted by that funeral home? That’s right: me. All it takes is one bad gig to completely ruin it.

I know shit happens, but it is usually not of this magnitude. Of the hundreds (maybe even thousands) of weddings, funerals, birthday parties, services, etc. I have played I have not once experienced a reed failure in a gig, until today.

Yeah, fuck the bagpipes. Just fuck them.


4 thoughts on “Dear Bagpipe, FUCK YOU!!!

  1. Fuckin’ bag pipes! I don’t want to invalidate or minimize, but at least you got a good rant from the experience. Never underestimate the value of a good rant, as they say, or should.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Aw man, they’re not going to give you a second chance, ever? Reed failures happen, right, and they’ve got to know it wasn’t your fault? And that statistically, it more than likely won’t happen again at one of their services? Omg 😖😰. Impressive kick, though! 💪🏼. I probably would have done the exact same thing.

    I’m so sorry 💐💞

    With any luck, this (shorter) week goes much more smoothly for you 🍀💓

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh nooooooo. Dude, I’m so sorry that happened! I would’ve kicked the damn thing too!
    Gah, Murphy and his fucking Law! I guess it’s a Memorial Day to remember…
    Hugs, hugs, hugs!!! I hope you have a better week!


Comments are closed.